Homer
Chief Wiggum
Groundskeeper Willie
Apu
Mr. Burns
Comic Book Guy
All the Rest
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Comic Book Guy
"That is a rare photo of Sean Connery signed by Roger Moore..."
"...it is not for infantile intellects such as yours..."
"40 bucks?! Forget it! You made me get off my stool for that?"
"...if you promise to put your grubby little hands behind your back and keep them there..."
"Ah! A superb choice!"
"I must hurry back to my comic book store. Where I dispense the insults rather than absorb them."
"No! Now go away. We are racing for the title of the champion of the universe."
"Ohhhh, so you're Bart Simpson eh? Well since my breakfast burrito is congealing rapidly, I will be blunt. You are too late, I sold your soul last night."
"...No you may NOT! The bathroom is for paying customers only!"
"...Oh pardon me Santos, if that is your real name. Bart Simpson. But your phony credit card is no good here. Now make like my pants, and split."
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"But Aquaman, you cannot marry a woman without gills! You're from two different worlds..."
"...That drawing is worth exactly $750 dollars American..."
"...Seeing as we are unfamiliar with sarcasm. I shall close the register at this point"
"Last nights Itchy and Scratchy, was, without doubt, the worst episode ever. Rest assured that I was on the Internet within minutes registering my disgust throughout the world."
"...Internet King? I wonder if he can provide faster nudity?"
"...I would thank you to stop peering at my screen play, Homer!..."