Life As A Bureaucrat @ Monday October 03, 2005 01:50 pm by WunderKraut

Life As A Bureaucrat

Update: Check out TREE WATCH 2005 for the continuing saga of this tree

___________________________

My last phone conversation:

Person: I really need to take the tree down. It is beginning to delay our project. The Department of Transportation says it is their property and they do not care if the tree comes down.

Me: The issue is with the City Attorney. I do not know how long it will be until we get this issue resolved.

Person: It is beginning to delay me.

Me: I can NOT tell you that you can remove the tree. You have an approved DOT permit that calls for the tree to be removed and it is on DOT right-of-way. Draw your own conclusions.

Person: The tree is coming down.

Me: I can NOT tell you that you can remove the tree.

Person: What happens if someone says something?

Me: A typical fine for a tree of similar size would be around $700.

Person: The tree is coming down.

/end conversation.

Being the good bureaucrat that I am, I immediately wrote a note to the file indicating that I DID NOT give him permission to remove the tree without a permit.

I think I need a shower.

15 Responses to “Life As A Bureaucrat”

  1. on 03 Oct 2005 at 2:10 pm   Cullen

    No worries. This stuff happens all the time in the military. Supervisors have a saying they use often when dealing with troops:

    I’m not going to tell you how to screw the pooch. I’m just telling you to screw the pooch.

    I don’t want to know what you had to do to get the job done. I just want the job done. Don’t know how many times this stuff goes on.

  2. on 03 Oct 2005 at 2:10 pm   Crotalus

    So can he cut down the tree or what?

  3. on 03 Oct 2005 at 2:14 pm   WunderKraut

    I did NOT tell him he could cut it down. I DID tell him that on trees of similar size that the fine would be $700.

    I did mention to our inspectors that a certain tree may be coming down and that they may get a call, but that the tree in question was on private property, i.e. DOT right-of-way.

  4. on 03 Oct 2005 at 2:36 pm   Cullen

    I’m not saying you did. Just that he has a job to do and someone over him doesn’t care what he does to get it done.

  5. on 03 Oct 2005 at 2:39 pm   WunderKraut

    Yeah, I know. The worse case is it costs them $700, but I will be dammed if I impose the fine.

  6. on 03 Oct 2005 at 2:50 pm   Cullen

    Oooh. You can impose fines. You have power!

  7. on 03 Oct 2005 at 3:45 pm   Cullen

    *I wish I had power*

  8. on 03 Oct 2005 at 4:43 pm   Nightfly

    Yup, there’s a Futurama for that. Click the Bureaucrat song.

    The world looks down on the bureaucrats
    They say we’re anal, compulsive, and weird
    But when push comes to shove
    You gotta do what you love
    Even if it’s not a good idea

    Heheheheheh.

  9. on 03 Oct 2005 at 5:40 pm   Hoodlumman

    “I won’t see anything while my back is turned. You’ll have a chance as I turn my back but I wouldn’t. I won’t see anything when my back is turned. Just sayin…”

    Yeah - I’ve done something like that.

  10. on 04 Oct 2005 at 10:24 am   Jack Yoest

    Managing Bureaucrats

    Rule Number One: Never Give a Bureaucrat a chance to say no. Morton Blackwell, founder of The Leadership Institute, wrote The Laws of the Public Policy Process that has 45 such pithy points. They are helpful to anyone dealing…

  11. on 04 Oct 2005 at 1:51 pm   Crotalus

    I’m confused. Can he cut down the tree or not?

  12. on 04 Oct 2005 at 4:42 pm   WunderKraut.com » TREE WATCH 2005

    [...] As of 4:42 pm, the TREE is still standing. I will keep you posted as this story develops. [...]

  13. on 05 Oct 2005 at 8:18 am   Draco

    I think you should probably inform your local tree hugger organization and let them deal with it. Wether or not the tree comes down it’ll still be a good show to watch.

  14. on 05 Oct 2005 at 1:18 pm   tree hugging sister

    tree hugger here!

    GET YOUR FILTHY HANDS OFF THAT TREE!!!

  15. on 06 Oct 2005 at 8:48 am   Draco

    get ‘em.
    eye-sore on public property: 1
    lumberjack : 0