Update: Yeah, so this post is a bit dark. Sorry about that.

Sometimes I feel that I write glibly about life. I avoid the bad things and only show you the good things. There is nothing wrong with that. But this time I wanted to give a glimpse inside the conflict in my heart and mind.

As I wrote in my Finding Gold post, I know the way I want to be and the solution to the darkness: speaking life and calling out the good in situations where evil was intended. Finding Gold is my new hearts cry. However, I still struggle with the old WunderKraut.

The old WunderKraut would live life like the first part of this post. The new one, not so much, but I have been having a tough time this week. I know the answer and I am walking in that answer, but that does not negate the fact that it is still a struggle sometimes.

So read this post but know that I am not on a cliff or standing on a box with a rope around my neck. On the contrary, I know the right way to go and I am heading that way, but sometimes the ride is a bit bumpy.

So have fun as you read a bit into the mind of WunderKraut.

As I wrote in my last post, I am a recovering pessimist.

Sometimes I fall off the wagon. It may seem like it, but today is not one of those days, though I have been struggling lately.

I can see it.

It is as clear to me as a pool of spring water.

The death, destruction, civil war, lives uprooted, chaos, desolation, heartache, loss, stone age, you name it.

I read the news and see what is going on and I can’t help but think of all the bad outcomes.

Someone tell me that it doesn’t have to be this way, that there is another way. Don’t tell me it has to get worse before it can get better. I know history and unfortunately when it gets worse, it gets orders of magnitude worse. I do not want to see that or go through that.

When I was riding home from work this week, I thought of how I would get to work once I could not afford gas anymore. I thought of how I would feed my family if everything came to a screeching halt. I thought of Iran and North Korea. I thought of the terrorists. I thought of the Left and the Right. I thought of the thought police and political correctness run amuck. I thought of nukes on the horizon. I thought of how the Roman empire must have felt as it descended into chaos and darkness.

That is what I mostly saw, darkness.

But, there has to be another way out. These things do not have to happen. We have been spared the worse for the past 60 years. We have grown soft and dependent and it is hard for me to see through the darkness.

Like I said earlier, it does not take a smart man to see the problems and to read the signs that we are heading into a terrible time. It does take a special person to see beyond the problems and to see a solution.

I wish I could see that and be that person, but I am having hard time.

The clouds are awful dark.

But, I’m sure praying that the darkness will fade and that I can see the truth, there is another way.