You don’t say:

Brown said he believed he may be the child of Margaret and Group Capt. Peter Townsend, whose romance ended in 1955 under pressure from the royal family and the Church of England.

See, that royal family is always causing trouble. You do know about the Trilateral Commission and the Queen don’t you?

Gee, if I’d known it was that easy, I would have tried harder to convince people that I was the illegitimate son of Steve Jobs. At least I may have gotten some stock or maybe an iPhone…

But..

Well, it seems Mr. Brown may not quite have all the marbles God intended him to have:

Brown “does not assert that any person or source, informed or otherwise, has ever told, or even suggested, to him that he is the illegitimate son of Princess Margaret.”

“Indeed, he acknowledges they have not. Rather, it seems from his own evidence that the origins of his assertion lie in thoughts, emotions and fantasies which have afflicted him comparatively recently in later life,”

Oh…yeah…I guess those are just voices in your head Mr. Brown and not past memories…

Predictably, a judge has tossed out his claim.

Stupid laws and their need for “proof”.